How to find the most efficient resource
In this article, I describe a procedure for determining the core intention in order to determine an efficient resource that can be used to change feelings.
Feelings
Feelings can only be changed with feelings! This is what Adrian Schweizer writes in an article in Praxis Kommunikation. The standard procedure for the transfer of emotional states in NLP and other change disciplines is the transfer of resources. NLPers call it "collapsing anchors". The client defines a problem state and a target state. In order to transfer the problem state into the target state, resources are needed: The client remembers an associated positive emotional state that he or she once experienced. This feeling can then be infiltrated into the problem state with a wide variety of anchoring techniques, so that the problem feeling turns into the goal feeling. For those who like to work efficiently, the question arises as to how to determine exactly the feeling that the client lacks in the problem situation?
What the client really needs
If you ask the client "What do you need?" or show him a menu of possible resources and ask him to choose some, he will usually choose the character traits that underlie his conscious belief model. The things that the client has stored in the unconscious, he cannot name at this moment. This is where the coach is called upon as a companion. I illustrate this in a small story as an excerpt of a coaching session with a client named Holger...
A little history
"Holger, if you allow yourself to feel so bad, and you also feel so bad responsible that you have this tension in your chest, why do you actually do that? What Win you for yourself if you make sure that you feel so bad here? Why Behavior are you like that?" Holger reacted with incomprehension at first. It was simply not clear to him spontaneously why he was doing this. To help him, I asked the nine Guide values according to Adrian Schweizer off. Holger came to the conclusion that behind the behavior the desire for INTEGRITY and after FREEDOM Put. How did he know that? His body reacted most violently when counting the two values: He started to fluctuate slightly with both values, which was not the case with the other values. A double check confirmed the findings. He added: "Because things have to be done and I want to get my projects done!". With John Grinder, the co-developer of NLP, I took the sentence from him as part of his New Code NLP training in Vienna: "What ́s the intention behind the intention?" So don't be satisfied with the motivation that comes to the surface first, but go deeper (into the unconscious)! So I drew a new frame around Holger's statement: "If your desire to get things done and lead projects is a strategy to accomplish something else, then what is your strategy for?" I framed the statements about motivation gained in this way again and again as a strategy and continued to drill until Holger went round in circles in his statements and in the end the following two statements came again and again:
- "I want to feel good! “
- "I want to Succeed! “
Bingo! We had arrived at the source of motivation. The resource that Holger needs most urgently in this context is Success and this success was the good feeling that he was missing. Of course, I asked Holger accordingly and he confirmed this view.
Result
If you carefully work out the "right" resource – according to Grinders "What is the intention behind the intention?" - in my experience, the gift of a single resource is usually enough to bring about the desired change in feeling! I now use this procedure as standard in my process models and enjoy the increase in efficiency together with my clients. I was asked by fellow coaches whether this deep descent to the source of motivation does not lead to problems and some unpleasant lateral effects. I have not observed or mirrored anything like this in my practice, even with clients with complex entanglements. Rather, the clients are amazed at how complicated they make it in life. For example, if they deliberately ask for INTEGRITY and slavishly adhere to rules, because they are thereby SAFETY hope. But this SECURITY is only the means with the aim of saving life INTENSE . However, they torpedo this goal with their integrity behavior, since subordination to a set of rules usually runs counter to the desired positive intense feelings. As a side effect, this approach also provides the coach with valuable information about the client's (formerly) unconscious life strategy. This can be the basis for further trusting development work.
